Marriage kills and other assorted facts of life

I read this article about men's health and some (supposed) factors that contribute to life expectancy and good health overall. What a load of shite. Anyone who suggests that married men and men with children live longer lives is full o' crap. Come on, this one is easy. Think about it. No fucking way marriage or kids make you live longer. Think of the added stress of a wife. Oh yeah, all that nagging and bitching surely will make you live a more stress free life . Children screaming, crying, whining, all seem like a wonderful idea for good health and prolonged life. Hell, you might as well take a job on an Alaskan crab fishing boat. Seafood is good for you, right? Don't worry about falling overboard and fucking dying. Data suggests fish is healthy. You should be fine. Anyone with half a brain knows that marriage and children increase stress and stress creates many a health problem. Look at every President of the United States. Regardless of your political leanings, it's obvious that enduring heavy amounts of stress prematurely age men. Clinton and Bush are the most recent and glaring examples. If you ever see a side by side picture of P.o.t.U.S.'s when they enter office and when they leave the change is staggering. Healthy, vigorous looking men leave the highest office looking older, weaker, and just plain worn out. The same thing happens when you wife bitches about the garbage, the car, the house/condo/apartment, work, money, your brat kids, bringing home strippers for threesomes,chores for you instead of watching some sporting event, visiting relatives you dislike, etc., etc. They are wearing you down! Get out now! The cat is out of the bag: your wife and kids are killing you slowly. I suggest a guys trip to Vegas, but your wife will probably say no. Pussy.